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Step #4- Hit The RESET Button
Some of the best performers were the worst types of coaches.
It was difficult for them to explain into words exactly how they did what they did because they were so natural. For example, Ted Williams on explaining how to see the baseball, or Steve Jobs on being creative.
No matter how skilled we are though, our true ability is reliant on being able to hit the reset button. It often doesn’t come naturally, we need to work on it.
Being able to hit the reset button means being able to develop the short-term memory and move on. This is a difficult skill. Hitting the reset button is easier said than done, but then again, what isn’t easier said than done.
Holding onto defeats and setbacks isn’t noble, or mentally tough, it’s self-flagellation. Learn from it and move on, use it as motivation, but move on.
Here’s how to do it.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue88f’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’1. Do an autopsy’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#b02b2c’ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Treat it like a death. State the facts of what happened? Was this a season ending loss, did you make an error, or perform poorly? Be clear and concise.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue8b4′ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’2. What’s the feeling you have?’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#edae44′ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Is it anger or sadness? Is it numbness or the lack of any feeling? Be clear and identify it.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue8bc’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’3. Stay with the pain until your pain reveals its gift.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#7bb0e7′ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Allow this time to grieve the setback. It’s okay to feel all of your feelings. Stay with the pain and identify the source.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue84f’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’4. Read Man in The Arena.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#745f7e’ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”][/av_icon_box]
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue85b’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’5. Failure is an event, not a person’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#b02b2c’ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Although you may treat it like a death, it’s not a death. After the autopsy is done, we don’t hang onto the body. Keep this event in its proper perspective.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue84b’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’6. Write out a gratitude list.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#edae44′ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
What are 5 things you are extremely grateful for?
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue891′ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’7. Repeat as necessary.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#7bb0e7′ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Go through each of these steps as many times as you need. It may take a few days or weeks to get over the loss, that’s okay. But hitting the reset button helps speed up the healing process.
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue836′ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’8. Look if you actually have hit the reset button.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#745f7e’ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Poor outcomes build upon themselves. Have you really let go of the poor performance?
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[av_icon_box position=’left_content’ boxed=” icon=’ue85d’ font=’entypo-fontello’ title=’9. Develop the habit.’ link=” linktarget=” linkelement=” font_color=’custom’ custom_title=” custom_content=” color=’custom’ custom_bg=’#b02b2c’ custom_font=’#ffffff’ custom_border=”]
Start doing this every single day. Yesterday ended last night. Hit the reset button.
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